Drunk Realities
by Shoukixx
Summary: Shizuo wants to get drunk and somehow Izaya is pulled into it. Smut ensues. [Oneshot] [Yaoi] [Shizaya] [Smut?]


**A/N: It's just a smutty one shot what other note is there left to put. I don't even know. I guess disclaimers like I wish Shizuo and Izaya belonged to me but they don't so boohoo. Also this is like hella gay so if u r not down w/ men getting down w/ other men, u should probably leave. Yeah. Okay have a nice day!**

It was one of the colder nights in Ikebukuro when Izaya had gone out, searching the streets in hopes of a little fun. But it also seemed to be the quieter ones too. There were no gang fights or angsty teenagers threatening to throw themselves off roofs but then again, he was always the one who started them.

"Hah." Izaya let out a puff of air, watching it condensate and dissipate and shivered. It was way too cold to be out. Shrugging his jacket so it was a little closer to his body, he skipped across the edge of a fountain, jumping nimbly from rail to rail as he made his way home when all of a sudden, he wasn't that cold anymore. A low growl erupted from behind him.

"I-za-yaaaaaaaaaa." The raven sighed inwardly and turned around, pasting a fake smile on his face.

"Shizu-chan! Brilliant night out isn't it?"

The blond gave no answer and instead narrowed his eyes. "What are you doing here, flea?"

Izaya put his hands up in mock surrender. "Now, now, Shizu-chan. Let's talk this out, ne? I was heading home, so really you have no-thing to worry about~ I'll just be going now hmm?" He spun sharply on his heels and walked away fast, his shoes clacking quietly. He could just imagine the protozoan with his brow furrowed and a stupid, confused look glued on his face.

But Shizuo shouldn't give him a problem tonight. He wasn't doing anything after all, and he _was_ heading home. And that's why it was such a shock to feel the blond pull at his arm.

"Oi flea."

Izaya sighed dramatically. "Yes, Shizu-chan. What do you want?"

The blond looked a little uncertain and a dim sense of surprise pulsed in some corner of the raven's heart. Then all at once it disappeared and Shizuo had his frowny, growly face back.

"Come drinking with me."

"Hah?" He certainly didn't see that coming. The blond looked even more annoyed.

"I'm saying that I need to get drunk and you're going to come with me." He grabbed roughly at Izaya's wrist and pulled him through the sparse, midnight crowd of Tokyo. The raven stumbled a little, before regaining his composure. He ripped his arm away from the blond and the frowns on Shizuo's face deepened.

Izaya rubbed his wrists which were slowly turning a pink. "My, my Shizu-chan. Didn't your mummy ever teach you any manners? If you want someone to do something, you ask them nicely."

Shizuo blanched a little, unsure if he was getting jeered or chastised. "What?"

"You have to ask people nicely if you want them to do what you want Shizu-chan. Come on, say it with me. 'Will you come drinking with me _please_ Izaya-sama?'"

Shizuo growled. "Izaya-sama my ass."

The raven shrugged. "Well I guess we're not going drinking then ne?" He put his hands in his jacket pockets and rocked lightly on his feet, smirking.

Shizuo looked like he was about to snap. A vein pulsed in his temple and Izaya could see the physical effort it took for the blond to remain semi-polite. He gritted his teeth before finally muttering something.

Izaya cupped his ear. "Sorry, didn't quite catch that. What did you say Shizu-chan?"

Shizuo reddened and muttered a little louder. "Will you….drinking…."

"Hmm~ I still can't quite hear."

"Will you bloody come drinking with me or not?!" Shizuo snapped.

Izaya clapped his hands together and sighed dramatically. "I suppose that will do. See? That wasn't so hard. Basic human etiquette, Shizu-chan. I'll go drinking with you. But no pubs." Pubs had big things. And big things had a way of finding themselves flying at Izaya's face whenever Shizuo was around.

Shizuo looked confused. "Then where would we go?"

"Hmm~ How about my place?"

"Are you fucking with me?"

"Oh? Is that a no? Guess I'll go drinking by myself then." Izaya was thoroughly enjoying this.

The blond gritted his teeth again before letting out a reluctant growl. "Fine. But I get to choose the liquor."

Izaya waved a finger in his face. "No Shizu-chan. You get to choose _your _liquor. I have class thank you very much."

"Whatever, I don't care. Let's go."

Izaya hummed a light tune as they set off towards the liquor store.

In the end, they bought 3 cases of beer. 2 cases of some cheap brand that Shizuo liked and 1 case of the liquor store's finest. Which was far from satisfactory but Izaya supposed it would have to do. Shizuo had already bulled his way through half a case in under an hour and Izaya looked on, amused. The raven had already finished 2 bottles and was on his third and he could feel the pleasant hum within his body. He made sure to keep his wits about him though.

"Ne, Shizu-chan. Why did you want me to drink with you?"

The blond was a little tipsy, the tell-tale flush crawling up his neck. He had undone his top button and his bowtie was thrown across the couch which was pressed up against Shizuo's back. Beer bottles had started to litter the coffee table and his apartment and Izaya made a mental note to tell Namie to clean it up later.

"Does it matter?"

"Um, yes. I don't take kindly to people who drag me out in the middle of the night to _drink_." Izaya scoffed.

The blond made no answer, only deigning to take a long drink from his bottle before throwing it away and opening another one. Izaya sighed loudly. "Shizu-chan, manners."

Shizuo scowled, picking up the nearest empty bottle and tried to throw it at Izaya's face. It sailed harmlessly to the left of him and landed with a thump on the other side of the room.

Izaya's mood was growing considerably darker. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was this shitty protozoan who kept chucking things at him.

The raven picked up his bottle of beer and swirled it around a little.

"Fine then. Truth or dare?" The blond looked a little irritated, or perhaps that was the alcohol doing its work. Either way Shizuo was beyond his normal protozoan logic.

"Truth."

Izaya smiled. "Hmm~ Let's see. What should I ask Shi-zu-chan…"

Shizuo took a swig of beer and grunted. "Just hurry up."

Carmine eyes narrowed and Izaya tensed a little. "How rude, Shizu-chan. I think I'm going to think long and hard about this question~"

Shizuo growled but made no attempt to end the raven's life. Which was fortunate since he was so drunk he probably couldn't put up a proper fight anyway. The blond flopped against the couch and threw his head onto it, eyes glazed and staring vacantly at the white ceilings of Izaya's apartment. "Hurry uuuup."

Izaya clicked his tongue before smirking. "Okay fine." He crawled next to Shizuo, dangling his beer bottle above his face. "Would you hit me if I dropped this on your head right now?"

The blond narrowed his eyes. "Do it and you'll regret you were born."

Izaya laughed and retracted the bottle, finishing the dregs before placing it neatly next to his other bottles. He opened a new one.

"Your turn Shizu-chan."

"Haah? Do I have to play this stupid game as well?"

Izaya tried to look wounded. "Shizu-chan! This is a very traditional game, passed down through the ages of adolescence and it should be respecte-"

"Yeah, yeah." The blond cut him off. "Truth or dare."

"Truth." Izaya smiled devilishly. "Come on, hit me with your best question."

Shizuo snorted. "I'd rather jus' hit you. Are you always this fucking annoying?"

"Ah! That counts as a question-"

Shizuo went back to his apathetic staring of the ceiling. "Whateverrrrr. I don't caaaare."

"-and yes I'm always this annoying." Izaya finished. "My turn. Truth or dare?"

"Dare me to kick your ass and I'll do it."

Izaya waved his hand dismissively. "Yes, yes. Truth or dare?"

Shizuo groaned. "Truth."

Izaya smiled playfully, "Ne, Shizu-chan. Are you still a virgin?"

Shizuo looked shocked. "And where the hell did that come from?!"

"You are, aren't you?" Izaya said with glee. "24 years of age, and you still haven't gotten laid!" Shizuo picked up a bottle and chucked it at Izaya's chest, but it was half-hearted and it barely registered. "Hell, that's got to be a record, Shizu-chan!"

Shizuo growled. "I _have _had…sex okay?"

Izaya snorted. "With who? Your hand?" He laughed again.

Shizuo looked away, pouting slightly. "It's none of your business."

"Hmm~" Izaya was starting to have fun. "Okay Shizu-chan. Let's play another game."

Shizuo sighed. "Do we have to?"

"It's your payment for using my house."

"You offered your house!"

"Details~ details~"

"So what stupid game are we playing now?"

"Another age old classic." Izaya said, winking. "Seven minutes in heaven."

Shizuo blanked before laughing, a deep throaty laugh. Izaya kept his face dead serious. Shizuo's laugh faded away to silence. "You're not kidding?"

Izaya scoffed. "No. Why would I be? Since you're such the sex expert, let's put it to the test shall we?"

_Hook. _

Shizuo reddened. "And why the hell should I agree to this?"

"I could tell the whole of Ikebukuro that you're a virgin. That shouldn't be hard."

_Line._

Shizuo narrowed his eyes. "That's a lie. And you wouldn't dare."

Izaya smirked. "Try me."

The raven could see the cogs whirring away in the blond's head and smiled when he saw them stop. The tips of Shizuo's ears were still red. "Fine. But you have to _promise _you won't spread lies about me." He growled.

_Sinker._

Izaya clapped his hand gleefully. "That's settled then!" He reached for his phone, setting his timer to seven minutes before flashing the screen at the blond. "See? Seven minutes."

The blond looked confused. "Who am I supposed to Seven Minutes in Heaven with?"

Izaya sighed. "How many people are here?"

"Two."

"Who are they?"

"You and me?"

"That should answer your question shouldn't it?" Izaya put his phone down, ready to press the start button.

"No. No, no no no no no no. I am NOT doing _anything _with you."

Izaya sighed dramatically. "I guess you are a virgin then. Time to text everyone~" He picked his phone up again, tapping at the screen.

Shizuo clenched his jaw and leapt for the raven's phone, but Izaya got it out of the way in time. His back was pressed against the floor and his right hand stretched above his head while his feet worried Shizuo's torso, stopping him from reaching the phone.

"Now, now Shizu-chan. Manners remember?"

Shizuo grit his teeth and leapt again, this time almost reaching Izaya's hand. The blond's left hand was next to Izaya's head while his right was battling for the phone. Shizuo grunted.

"Don't you dare you flea!"

"Ah, now that's the spirit." Izaya smirked and pressed something on the screen. Dropping the phone, he crossed his arms around the back of Shizuo's head and pulled himself up to meet his lips in one swift motion. The blond uttered a sound of surprise and pulled away, but Izaya held on.

"You fucking flea! You sent it didn't you?!"

"Maybe I did. Maybe I didn't. Who knows~" Izaya hummed and leaned in again, nipping playfully at the blond's lips. Shizuo rumbled, the sound reverberating pleasantly through Izaya's body, sending a shock to his groin.

"You absolute _shit!_" Angrily, Shizuo pushed Izaya down. Surprised, Izaya lost his balance and fell backwards on the floor, with the blond looming over him. The raven merely smirked. Licking his lips, he leaned into Shizuo's ear and murmured, "Hit me with your best shot lover boy." Before locking their lips again.

This time, Shizuo took control. He coaxed Izaya's mouth open, and his tongue explored to its content before dipping down into the hollow of his throat, trailing kisses all the way down. Izaya gasped quietly as Shizuo hit a sensitive spot and the blond smirked, sucking hard on it.

"Don't," Izaya said breathlessly, "leave marks!"

The blond nudged Izaya's face to the side, kissing down the other side of his neck. "I'll do what I want, flea." The term was far from endearment but Izaya could still feel the betrayal of his body as another shock made his erection grow.

Shizuo had somehow managed to take off his jacket and had pushed up the raven's shirt, exposing his chest and abs. The blond dipped into one nipple, sucking and flicking and licking, before paying his respects to the other, all the while palming the Izaya through his jeans.

"A-Ah…! Shi- nngh…" Izaya arched his back, a sex-induced haze filling his mind as he tried to get closer to the warmth that was Shizuo, grinding his hips shamelessly.

"Someone's enjoying this." He whispered next to his ear and dipped down again, kissing his lips. Izaya could feel the smirk and whined quietly when the blond pulled away. Opening his eyes, the raven saw that the blond was still fully dressed and he pouted.

"That's not fair. You have to take your clothes off too Shizu-chan."

Shizuo shrugged and quickly unbuttoned his bartender shirt, flinging it off to the side. Izaya drank in the man before him. Although he always tried to keep in shape, he was nothing compared to Shizuo. His muscles were carved perfectly, each a masterpiece in its own right and when he moved and flexed, they rippled so _sexily._ Izaya ran his hand over them, enjoying the feeling and pulled the blond closer to him, kissing him heatedly again. "You're hot," he murmured into his mouth and he detected a hint of resistance from the blond as Shizuo pulled away.

"No I'm no-"

Izaya kissed him again. "Shut up. Yes you are."

The blond smiled thinly and pushed Izaya back, almost tenderly moving his black bangs from his eyes before smiling devilishly. Izaya grew even stiffer.

"What are you going to do, Shizu-chan?" he whispered, those heated honey eyes almost burning him.

"We only have seven minutes. I like a challenge." He dipped down to Izaya's groin and sucked noisily at his bulge through the fabric and Izaya tried to keep himself from bucking. His pre-cum was starting to leak but the blond sucked it anyway. "Sh-Shizu..oooo…."

"Shh…" He moved up to kiss the raven and Izaya could taste the taste of his pre-cum and Shizuo mixed together and his carmine eyes closed, his bulge screaming for friction. Shizuo undid Izaya's jeans and discarded them carelessly, quickly palming his erection before drawing it out.

It leapt from its confines quite gladly and stood tall and proud, almost touching Izaya's stomach. Shizuo gave it a few lazy pumps before dropping down and licking the length easily, barely touching, _teasing. _

"Hard…er…Shi…zu…nngh.." Izaya's eyes snapped open and he laced his fingers through the blond's hair, involuntarily forcing his head down. Shizuo snapped up and glowered at him. He couldn't even say anything before the blond grabbed his wrists, tying his hands together above his head with his belt. "N-No-"

Shizuo sucked on the base of his neck. "Bad boys need to be punished." He moved back down and licked the head of Izaya's cock and took him in. Bobbing his head up and down, Izaya could tell that Shizuo hadn't done this before but he was learning fast and god was he _good._ His cheeks hollowed and the raven felt his length hit the back of the blond's throat. Shizuo hummed and the vibration nearly sent him off the edge and he took in a shuddered gasp of air, stopping himself.

He nibbled on the frenulum, licking the underside and sucked gently where his balls met his penis before taking it all again, up and down and up and down. It was too much for Izaya and by the time he hit the back of his throat again, he could feel his release coming.

"Ahhn…Shizu…I'm…_coming…!" _Shizuo let go and Izaya arched his back, spurting streams of white all over Shizuo and his stomach, his orgasm ripping through his body like a white hot fire. The blond licked the side of his mouth where some of his cum had stayed and Izaya would have gone hard again if he wasn't so spent.

Panting, he fell back against the floor. "Sorry…Shizu-chan…I didn't…" He struggled to keep his eyes open. "I didn't mean to dirty you." Shizuo still had some of his release on his neck and shoulders and Izaya reached up with both his tied hands and tried as best he could to wipe it off but the blond stopped him, sucking each of his soiled fingers in turn.

"You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to." He said simply. Grabbing his white shirt, he draped it over Izaya before reaching for the box of tissues, cleaning himself up. That was when Izaya saw Shizuo's bulge.

"Shizu-chan."

"Mm?" he said absent-mindedly, still wiping.

"Untie me please."

"Oh, right. Sure. Sorry." He reached over and undid the belt and as soon as he did, Izaya moved into a larger area of floor and flipped himself over, spreading his cheeks wide apart.

Shizuo's eyes widened. "Flea, what are you doi-"

"Second drawer over there. Grab the bottle for me would you?"

Izaya's phone buzzed noisily right then and Shizuo looked a little uncomfortable. "That's seven minutes. You don't need to-"

"I want to." Izaya's eyes blazed and the blond looked a little taken aback. He hesitated before reaching for the second drawer, pulling out the lube as Izaya shut the phone off and threw it onto the couch.

Izaya slathered his fingers with it and got on his knees, gently pushing one finger in his hole. "Mmff…nngh…ah…." He could feel the flush coming on again and took care to hide his face from the blond. He could still feel the intensity of those honey eyes, boring into his nakedness and he felt a little strange.

The first finger had gone in to his knuckle and he inserted a second slowly, adjusting before scissoring. He barely registered to _click _and _shush _of Shizuo's pants behind him but when he felt the warmth of the blond over him, he could feel his cock growing stiff again.

He wasn't ready for the wetness that would come probing in his ass so when it did, he let out a sound of surprise but Shizuo merely moved his fingers away and pushed through each ring of muscle carefully, tenderly and started eating him out.

"Are you ready?" Shizuo asked softly, leaning over the raven so his boxers was touching his cheeks. In response, Izaya ground back into him, wantonly moaning. Shizuo kissed him on the neck and quickly slipped out of his boxers, quickly slathering a coat of lube on his cock. "I have a condom in my wallet, just let me-"

"Leave it." Izaya said through half-lidded eyes and Shizuo complied.

Grabbing Izaya's hips, he entered slowly and Izaya could hear the blond's laboured breathing but he kept still until the raven murmured a quiet 'okay'. He started moving slowly, pulling out and pushing in at an agonising pace until Izaya couldn't stand it, bucking his hips to speed it up. Shizuo got the message and Izaya heard a quiet laugh from behind him, to his chagrin.

So the blond quickened, banging him quicker to quickly to hard to relentlessly and when he found Izaya's prostate, he hit it so well Izaya screamed and shuddered, his strength failing and he dropped onto his chest, his arms unable to support his weight. Each time after that he made sure to angle his hips perfectly so it would align until finally, Izaya could feel his second release and he clenched. Shizuo grunted and the raven felt him swelling inside him. The blond moved to pull out but Izaya defiantly clenched and moved backwards and Shizuo leaned over him, kissing him over his back and the raven could feel the smile. When they released together, he pounded one last time into him, so, so _deep_ and so _hot_, arching his back and yelling a low, incoherent sound.

As his orgasm washed over him, Shizuo drew himself out and fell next to the raven, both panting. Izaya's knees were a little raw and he could feel the cum dribbling out of his ass but he didn't particularly care as he basked in the afterglow.

Turning to Shizuo, he draped an arm over his chest, relishing the feel of his body panting breathlessly underneath him and said, "I didn't send the message. You're right. Definitely not a virgin."

Shizuo laughed breathily. "You're an ass and I told you so."

"Do we cuddle now?"

**A/N: Yaaaay.**


End file.
